Top Ten Signs You're a Game Show Junkie
| 10. | Your cable package is so cheap because it's the Game Show Network - and nothing else |
| 9. | One night you had the strange, irresistible urge to mold a mound of mashed potatoes into a bust of Alex Trebek |
| 8. | Your neighbors have repeatedly called the cops when you scream at the old ladies on Wheel of Fortune who just don't know when to buy a freakin' vowel! |
| 7. | The dog hides under the bed every time he hears Bob Barker say, "Have your pet spayed or neutered!" |
| 6. | You wake up sweating in the middle of the night screaming "No Whammies! No Whammies!" |
| 5. | In high school you were voted "Most Likely to Get Molested on National TV by Richard Dawson" |
| 4. | At dinner time, the family has to choose what's in the oven or what's underneath the box |
| 3. | Your doorbell is actually a large, red buzzer |
| 2. | Your friends hate you because you answer all their questions in the form of a question |
| 1. | At weddings you don't throw rice at the bride and groom - you throw Rice-a-Roni |
