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NOVEMBER 1998 | VOL. 2, NO. 6


HUMOR

CURRENT HUMOR


RECENT HUMOR |
Kids Say the Strangest Things


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QUOTE OF THE MONTH:
"I won't say anything about us being the greatest. But there hasn't been anybody better." - George Steinbrenner, after the Yankees' World Series sweep and a major league recording year of 125 wins.

 

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Humor: Thanksgiving Top Ten | Thorough Instructions

Thorough Instruction

IN THE INSTRUCTIONS FOR A HAIRDRYER:

Do not use while sleeping.

ON A BAG OF FRITOS:

You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.

ON A BOX CONTAINING A BAR OF DIAL SOAP:

Directions: Use like regular soap.

ON A FROZEN TV DINNER BOX:

Serving suggestion: Defrost.

ON A HOTEL-PROVIDED SHOWER CAP IN A BOX:

Fits one head.

ON TESCO'S TIRIMISU DESSERT (Printed on the bottom of the box):

Do not turn upside down.

ON A BOX OF MARKS & SPENCER BREAD PUDDING:

Product will be hot after heating.

ON PACKAGING FOR A ROWENTA IRON:

Do not iron clothes on body.

ON BOOTS CHILDREN'S COUGH MEDICINE:

Do not drive car or operate machinery

ON A BOX OF NYTOL (A sleep medication):

Warning: May cause drowsiness

ON A KOREAN KITCHEN KNIFE:

Warning keep out of children

ON A STRING OF CHINESE MADE CHRISTMAS LIGHTS:

For indoor or outdoor use only.

ON A JAPANESE FOOD PROCESSOR:

Not to be used for the other use

ON SAINSBURY'S PEANUTS:

Warning: Contains nuts

ON AN AMERICAN AIRLINES PACKET OF NUTS:

Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts.

ON A SWEDISH CHAINSAW:

Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands.

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