Top Ten Signs You're Having a Bad Halloween
| 10. | The popcorn ball in your bag has an expiration date of 1974 |
| 9. | The ghost costume you made out of some old bed sheets has the Care Bears all over it |
| 8. | At your friend's party, they run out of apples so you have to bob for radishes |
| 7. | After asking "Trick or Treat," your obnoxious neighbor responds with a wedgie |
| 6. | The local store has a shortage of Darth Maul costumes and an abundance of Jar Jar Binks |
| 5. | Your friends comment on your scary mask...you're not wearing one |
| 4. | You later find out that your father was not wearing a mailman costume |
| 3. | Neighbors run out of candy early...your bag is filled with IOUs |
| 2. | Your Teletubbies costume gets confiscated by Jerry Faldwell |
| 1. | Chocolate = zits |
